In light of recent events, we feel it’s important to let you all know that the Beer conspiracy is not racist. The Global Beer Industrial Complex, on which we report, is primarily a financial conspiracy. They want everyone to drink beer, wine, and/or liquor and pay for the privilege of doing so. After a few drinks, they expect you to have fun, make bad decisions, and drink some more. If they were racist in any way, they would be alienating a significant portion of the market. They even like those folks who don’t drink (most of them, anyway) because you never know when they might fall, jump, or be pushed off the proverbial wagon.
Drinking beer is usually part of a social event. Nothing brings people together better than a tasty beer, a bottle of wine, or a round of shots. People who think that their skin color, religion, or sexual orientation makes them superior to anyone else are simply wrong and for them to even think that, much less shout it in public is abhorrent to us as (well as our Beer Overlords).
We condemn, in the strongest possible terms the recent and any future acts of hatred or violence.
We encourage everyone, of legal age, to instead get a six-pack, or bottle of their favorite adult beverage and share it with some other adults.
Can anyone really hate each other after they’ve gotten loaded and slurred “I love you guys!” We think not.
We're not sure who this guy is, but he's on to something.
Please spread the word. Let everyone know, but make sure they know it's a secret that nobody is supposed to know.
Oh, and be careful!
You never know who's watching you or how much beer they've had to drink, or how much you will need to drink in order to forget they exist.
We believe that the Beer (and other Liquor) companies are a crucial part of the New World Order Conspiracy... probably...
They are systematically keeping the Free World drunk, or at least buzzed enough so that we won't pay attention to or worry about their other diabolical plans.
Everywhere you look, even on TV there are ads for beer and other alcoholic drinks. Everywhere.You probably even have some beer advertising in your home. A PBR t-shirt, or a Budweiser key chain. Maybe a collection of beer steins on the mantle. You have become a part of the conspiracy that allows these huge multinational conglomerates to keep selling the only legal addictive drug in the free world (other than nicotine.. and caffeine, but those are entirely different conspiracies and someone else will have to build those websites).
Alcohol kills more people each year than war! (We are Not suggesting that anyone should give up either.)
Don't get us wrong, we aren't suggesting that alcohol be banned. Prohibition didn't work in the past and it won't work any better today. We like a nice cold beer as much as the next person, but we'd rather drink our own home brew, untouched by greedy corporate hands! (Except, of course, for when we are out of home brew, which we usually are... because we don't actually brew any ourselves, though, we know people who do, or so they have told us.)
We present here articles of interest that prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that there's something that doesn't smell quite right in the International Beer Industrial Complex, headquartered in Bavaria, or maybe Belgium. Read them for yourself and you decide if you are going to continue playing right into their hands when you're crying into your beer, or if it's time to take back your beer and drink it!