As the above photo clearly shows, someone has been drinking beer on Mars.
The photos was actually taken by NASA's aptly named Spirit Rover in November of 2007. It wasn't until recently that one of those people who has nothing better to do than look at NASA's old Myspace photos in excruciating detail found the item.
Clearly this indicates some level of intelligent life on Mars. They might be drunk, but by golly, they are drunk on Mars!
Now, some might argue that this is simply a trick of the light on the rocks or something like that, but we see it as clear and undeniable proof of an Interstellar Beer Industrial Complex that not only runs this planet, and this solar system, but the whole of this galaxy, at least. What remains to be uncovered is whether or not there is a brewery on Mars, Where are the hops grown? and what is the ABV (alcohol by volume) content? We suppose it might also be interesting to find out who drank this beer, why did he/she leave the bottle laying there, what was the price of the beer (including taxes), and what did it taste like? Furthermore, without a closer examination we don't even know if it was light beer or even a lager. It could be an intergalactic IPA or deep space dark brown ale for all we know.
One thing is certain. We can rest assured that when we do find the aliens, we will be able to sit down and share nice cold brew with them.
We're not sure who this guy is, but he's on to something.
Please spread the word. Let everyone know, but make sure they know it's a secret that nobody is supposed to know.
Oh, and be careful!
You never know who's watching you or how much beer they've had to drink, or how much you will need to drink in order to forget they exist.
We believe that the Beer (and other Liquor) companies are a crucial part of the New World Order Conspiracy... probably...
They are systematically keeping the Free World drunk, or at least buzzed enough so that we won't pay attention to or worry about their other diabolical plans.
Everywhere you look, even on TV there are ads for beer and other alcoholic drinks. Everywhere.You probably even have some beer advertising in your home. A PBR t-shirt, or a Budweiser key chain. Maybe a collection of beer steins on the mantle. You have become a part of the conspiracy that allows these huge multinational conglomerates to keep selling the only legal addictive drug in the free world (other than nicotine.. and caffeine, but those are entirely different conspiracies and someone else will have to build those websites).
Alcohol kills more people each year than war! (We are Not suggesting that anyone should give up either.)
Don't get us wrong, we aren't suggesting that alcohol be banned. Prohibition didn't work in the past and it won't work any better today. We like a nice cold beer as much as the next person, but we'd rather drink our own home brew, untouched by greedy corporate hands! (Except, of course, for when we are out of home brew, which we usually are... because we don't actually brew any ourselves, though, we know people who do, or so they have told us.)
We present here articles of interest that prove beyond a shadow of a doubt that there's something that doesn't smell quite right in the International Beer Industrial Complex, headquartered in Bavaria, or maybe Belgium. Read them for yourself and you decide if you are going to continue playing right into their hands when you're crying into your beer, or if it's time to take back your beer and drink it!